Saturday 19 April 2008

Is God a beetle?

Since the end of your second world war, there has been quite a strange thing happening with you lot. On the one hand you're inventing/resurrecting religions/belief systems left, right and centre because the ones you have don't appeal to you any more. They were made for simpler times when people were less well educated and too busy trying to stay alive to worry about the whichness of the why.

On the other hand you've whole gangs going around stripping any changes that might have been made to their religion to take account of societal development and taking a fundamentalist view. I guess those people just don't want to think for themselves at all. The 'Good Book', whichever one you choose, has done all the thinking for you!

Now it's said that around 50% of Americans believe in a literal interpretation of Christianity's creation myth, ie God created the earth and everything in it in six days! Now I find the percentage hard to credit but even if it's off by a factor of 2, that's a hell of a lot of people.

Now I 'believe' in evolution by natural selection. That is, I think it's the best solution to the variety of life on the planet that anyone's come up with. It might not be completely true but it's so good at explaining things that, like quantum mechanics, it's got to be close. A lot closer than some omnipotent god. I look at King Penguins and I look at me and we're pretty much the same, except we're bigger. Now a King wouldn't last a month here, that's why they breed closer to the sea. Not enough fat or stamina. Doesn't it make more sense to think that some ancestor of a King who was just a little bigger and a little fatter could better his/her chances of survival by moving further inland away from predators and eventually get to be us? Or would you rather believe some omnipotent deity made Emperors and the Kings are just half baked runts? First attempts?

Now I want to conduct a little experiment. You don't believe as I do and so conjecture that at some 'time' an omnipotent being woke up one 'Monday morning' and thought, "What shall I do today? I know I'll make a planet!" Well OK, it was probably more like he/she was looking into the featureless void and thinking, "Now what that needs is a nice little blue/green planet, some flecks of white here and there. Go nice with all those little lamps I made eons ago. Be a nice focal point for the void, I think"

I think we also have to assume that world making is not God's main day job. Given the time at his/her disposal, we'd be up to our ears in planets if it were. So it's a vanity project. A bit like Russell Crowe or David Hasselhof playing rock music (badly), something they do when they're not doing what they usually do, although I don't know what God's day job actually is, nor Hasselhof's for that matter, at least Crowe can act (a bit).

So on the Monday morning God starts work. Fashions a big rock, adds water, air, creates all this false history in the rocks like seas where land is and vice versa, remains of animals that aren't around anymore. Stuff like that. Sometime later, he/she thinks life might be a good idea. Something other than him/herself to admire the handiwork, this is a vanity project, remember. So he/she creates the seemingly endless variety of life we all see every day. Right at the end he/she fashions two creatures, in his/her own image, plonks them in a prehistoric MacDonalds and says, "Enjoy your meal! Have a nice day!"

Now Thomas Huxley, one of the twentieth century's great biologists, once remarked that God must be inordinately fond of beetles. Whether he nicked that from Linnaeus or not I don't know. Anyhow, he made the comment because something like 25% of all the different species on the planet are beetles! Now, and here comes the experiment, imagine you're God involved in a vanity project. In what way do you make your own 'image' visible in the world you've created? By creating two versions of yourself or creating millions. You can probably reckon which side I come down on.

So God is a beetle. Isn't that just as plausible? Remember, the experiment doesn't allow you to postulate fast population turnover, a very plastic body plan, no internal skeleton, small size and so a wide variety of micro-niches to evolve into etc etc.

No, you have to conclude that God is a beetle.

6 comments:

  1. Perhaps I am a very bad Christian. That was funny. Very funny. Thank you for the link.

    And still, I have so many questions.

    Since my day job happens to be being the mother of six children (which are created in, yes, my image! and their father's image!) I will save them (the questions, not the children) for another day.

    It has been a pleasure discussing philosophy, physics and religion with you.

    Have a nice day!

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  2. Fricka here

    I'm covering while he stuffs his face at sea!

    He should be back tomorrow and will no doubt thank you for your kind words, but six? I've only had four and then each,for only three months at a time. You must still have them all! As you humans say, respect!

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  3. Well, Fricka, I'm back. And I have a little more to propose, ask, conjure, conjecture...choose the apropos verb.

    You are right. Some people don't
    want to think for themselves. The particular people I am thinking about commonly describe "a headache" when they do this. These are college educated people who managed to sidestep any and all conflict with their Christian faith while in class. I suppose it is possible, but it has not been with me.

    On the other hand, I was thinking, after reading your post, about the what if's and why for's and imagining that I am God and that I create the world. Except, I would not have created the world on a Monday. I would rather create the world on Sunday and then I would have the rest of the week to finish up my work and still take a day off on Saturday. I know some people, especially Christians, who like to take two full days off, but if I was God, I wouldn't do that because once I find something to do, I have a difficult time putting it away for even a few hours. But, I'm God. I have to set a good example. So, I take Saturday off (the last day of the week) and spend the whole day admiring my art.

    Which brings me to another point. The God (god) you described doesn't really have a day job. But if I was God, I would never sit around watching soap operas and yelling at the TV trying to get people who are bendt on adultery to change their cheating ways.

    Nope. No siree. I would probably be an artist. If something I didn't like didn't turn out the way I wanted it to, I could just ditch it, or leave it on a shelf and wait until I "felt" what I was supposed to do with it. I know there are some gods out there that just keep cranking out the creatures no matter what they look like, but when I get to be God, I'm a little more choosy.

    Rather than make all my images look like me, I take my time scrathing notes, doing scale drawings and thinking about how I could express an image of me, without actually making it look exactly like me. Becuase I'm an impressionist. I like to leave people up to their own devices to see what they come up with.

    You know, this can be risky. I've seen some real monsters in the art classes I lead with small chlldren. And then, sometimes, beyond my wildest imagination, I could not have dreamed of a more beautiful expression...myself. So my little creatures would be my inspiration while I marveled in them.

    I would not create millions of images of myself. That isn't really useful or necessary because if I really love something, I only need a few good ones. A million of them will take over my life and I can't possibly love them all the same. But, "You're God" you say. Well, yes, but I'm god on my terms, not anyone else's (while we are playing this god-game.)

    So, you see, there is more than one way to play the god-game.

    And while we are on this game, since I'm god, I'm thinking that when I put the world in motion, it takes me a while. I mean, sure I created light. But it took me quite a while to separate darkness from light. While that was going on, the atoms and the elements were making light and heat and all sorts of new ingredients I hadn't thought of, because I simply made them to please myself and I knew that by giving them different characteristics and qualities, endless possibilities for my own amusement were available, rather than a static predictable Soap Opera. But speak for yourself. Your God may be a highly rational and orderly traditionalist with a limited imagination.

    I have more to say, but college classes are in a few hours and I still have three miles of my five mile daily walk to finish up.

    Yes, I still have all my children, but only half of my wits about me. Til another day....

    It's been a pleasure.

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  4. Okay, Mr. & Mrs. penguin. I promise to read from the start before I post anything else.

    I just had a thought while on my walk. One way to see this is:

    Faith is belief being held in suspense.

    Tell me if that does anything for you...

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  5. Well, I'm back too and I thought all I was going to have to do was say was 'thank you' not answer a philosophical treatise :)

    So thank you for your kind words, and if you want, I will answer the question about isotope half lives. (It's the least I can do if you actually read all of this drivel) July takes a turn but it evens out...eventually.

    I will cogitate and meditate on your ideas while I wait for Fricka to return.

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  6. Hi Penguin,

    I guess you've read this quote from the Greek philosopher, Xenophanes:

    "The Ethiopians make their gods black-skinned and snub-nosed; the Thracians say theirs have blue eyes and red hair. If oxen and horses had hands and could draw and make works of art as men do, then horses would draw their gods to look like horses and oxen like oxen - each would make their bodies in the image of their own."

    Since you left a link on my blog, I'll leave one on yours. Something I wrote a couple of years ago.

    Regards, Paul.

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